The World Cup kicks off tonight. That means two things: a month of seriously dull football matches which remind you why international football isn’t very good, and restaurateurs flogging World Cup-themed burgers.

Not that I’ve got an issue with either. I love percentage football and I love burgers.

Ahead of the irresistible spectacle of Russia v Saudi Arabia, I’ve been invited to The Blues Kitchen in Curtain Road, Shoreditch, to try its World Cup-inspired burger of the month.

While the burger’s name – “Hand of God” – isn’t the most imaginative, the recipe certainly is. Like Diego Maradona himself, it’s complex. And formidable.

The monster consists of an Argentinean steak patty with Provoleta cheese, slices of avocado, slices of chorizo, chimichurri, mayo, a tomato, lettuce and a totally unnecessary (but worthy) fried egg.

Again, like Maradona with a ball at his feet, the burger can do many things at once.

So the delicate spiciness of the chimichurri is like Diego effortlessly gliding past defenders. The juicy patty is the main attraction, akin to his memorable goals. And just when the game is getting too hectic, the cool avocado comes in and slows everything down – like all the great players can do.

That’s enough football analogies from me. Basically, the burger is great. It’s so filling, it’s like two meals in itself. But you also get fries and slaw for your £14.

My plus one, who can’t bear the thought of eating this, goes for a standard cheeseburger (£11.50, also including the fries and slaw) instead. There’s obviously less to deal with, but I have a bite and to be honest, it’s just as delicious.

It’s in an impressive setting, too. Old Street, and its establishments, can sometimes feel cramped. But even though the Blues Kitchen is packed with customers on a Wednesday night, it benefits from a big site and retains an airy spaciousness. Perfect when you’re eating ridiculous burgers.

The Hand of God is available until June 30. The Blues Kitchen is in 134-146 Curtain Road, EC2 3AR.